The Horse is Dead

Among gossip blogs and news outlets alike, there are a few people who are still in the news that, well, shouldn't be.  Are we trying to ignore the impending health care legislation that will soon make its debut in the Senate?  Ignoring the 10% unemployment rate?  Whatever we are trying to get away from, I still can't believe the following clowns are still getting jawed over:

Carrie Prejean: A conservative beauty queen whose remarks about gay marriage brought her front and center, but now we just have to read about her sex tape and her anti-porn remarks.  Honey, you ain't the only one with an overblown ego and still providing a worthless job for your publicist.  See Kardashian, Khloe.

Paris Hilton:  Ok, she actually does a few things like sell some perfume and help luxury designers keep size-11 shoes in vogue.  Otherwise, this describes exactly what I think is wrong with Hollywood:  Brain drain.

Jon Gosselin and Levi Johnston:  Two bad fathers getting the limelight.  Exactly the role models that young men need these days.  Also known for neither of them able to keep it in their pants (Jon's got eight kids, and Levi does his 'Playgirl' shoot next week.  If I have to read one more article about manscaping...)

Anyone Lohan:  More dysfunctional than when we were introduced to the Osbournes, this family is certified Grade-A quacky.  An absentee father and money-grubbing White Oprah fight freely in the spotlight for the next headline about their daughters Lindsay and Ali, with both of the kids looking like they are as old as Mom.  Last week, Michael Lohan exposed some juicy taped phone calls about Lindsay's ongoing War on Drugs (she's losing big time).  Now Dina Lohan has figured out a way to get her daughter's name associated with Heath Ledger.

Anyone Kardashian:  Saturating the news outlets like week-old cat pee, the Kardashians have found plenty of ways to keep the lens in their direction.  Pregnancy!  (Fake) marriage!  Boobs!  Butt!  Black eyes!  Reggie Bush!  If you think the name sounds familiar, Google "Kardashian Simpson" and see why.

Joe Jackson:  Just... no.  His son dies and now he's gossip fodder - of his own making.

Bad Dads in General:  Hmm.  Jude Law (although Mama isn't that much of a winner either).  Balthazar Getty (a married father of four frolicking with Sienna Miller).  Larry Birkhead (one of Anna Nicole Smith's several paramours who dragged a DNA fight through the mud). It's too bad there's plenty more.

So why do we thrive on worthless celebrity gossip?  Do we love the escape from our own lives?  Do we equate this kind of life with money, power or prestige?  Is it a way to bring celebs down to our level, trying to find every mistake and sex tape they've made, to bring them down off their pedestal and realize they're more like us inconspicuous folk?  It's probably a bit of each.  Just another few questions in my unofficial, everlasting study of American news and gossip media, its attempts at showing us newsworthy stories without a filter, and the questions we should ask ourselves when accessing it on a daily basis.