So, lately I've realized that when I log into Facebook and Twitter these days, I find myself censoring myself before typing up a status or a Tweet. This is not necessarily a bad thing, because some days I'm prone to more profanity than others, but now I wonder why I'm doing it. Instead of these online tools opening the world to me, I find myself Tweeting a few times in my head before actually taking fingers to keyboard. There are three reasons I've identified so far, and there are probably more, but socializing online has created something of quandary for me when it comes to speaking my mind:
-Passive-aggressive statuses: Yesterday after the Steelers lost to the Raiders, I changed my Facebook status to "Defecting from Steelers Nation." Yeah, it was immature and in the heat of the moment, and I LOVE that one of my girlfriends told me to not take the bandwagon way out of it - she was direct about it and got me out of my funk. But then another friend updated her status later, essentially saying that "seriously, it's only a game... wow." Then one of her comments stated that she didn't hate the Steelers but didn't get why everyone gets so pissed off about their team losing. Look, maybe I was being a big baby that my team lost. Maybe she wasn't directing it at me. But then again, who was she directing her comments at? Couldn't you just comment on their wall and own up to your opinions? Just tell us how you really feel. Don't pussyfoot it. I can see everything that people do on Facebook... If we're so scared to have an opinion, maybe we should just keep it to ourselves.
-Family on Facebook: I love that my family is on Facebook, because I'm out of town and like to see what is going on their lives. At a Halloween party this year, I disseminated that fact to a fellow partygoer, who vowed that she would never, ever friend her parents on Facebook. She even looked a bit weirded out that I used Facebook in a different way than she did. Which gets me thinking: How we conduct ourselves in front of others is usually based on its social context. For example, we all act, censor and conduct ourselves in a particular way at work versus playing poker at a friend's house or partying at a bar. We are not wholly the same person in those situations. What does that say about our virtual selves, then? Who are you on Facebook? Who are you on Twitter? Can you say you're the same person in real life as on Facebook (and Facebook is NOT real life. I don't care how many teenyboppers say otherwise). But I will admit that there are some things I just don't discuss on Facebook because of who's been reading my status updates. I feel much more comfortable discussing some things in person.
-There's always another point of view: Recently I signed the Hopenhagen petition and posted it to my Facebook profile, feeling in a somewhat proactive mood. I got a comment from a former coworker of mine asking me to read a scholarly paper on the Copenhagen summit, which highlighted a lot of opposing points on which the summit might not be the best thing for the United States, and there were a lot of things to think about. Another former coworker posted (not in response to me) about the carbon footprint of the summit, and it was just awful: Hundreds of private planes, over 1,000 limos, and a mere five hybrid vehicles, because Denmark taxes the hell out of those suckers. Add that to the fact that there is a question of whether humans actually caused climate change, and the corporate sponsors of the Hopenhagen petition (Coca-Cola, BMW and Gap?!), I wonder if the petition truly outlined my hopes for how we conduct ourselves in reducing waste and not leaving so much garbage for our children. Regardless of whether the ice caps are melting because of humans or a natural change in the Earth's temperatures, we should continue our recycling habits anyway... but what are the implications of policy change for the world's most powerful governments and corporations? Is the movement towards being "green" beginning in the right place? Yeah, I don't know either.
As usual, I'm not sure if this analysis of my self-censoring will get me any closer to being more honest about who I am on Facebook compared to real life. I usually reserve my most controversial opinions about things to those closest to me, and my husband gets the brunt of it. These meanderings through social media have not only muddled what kinds of things I'm comfortable sharing online, but also ensured that anything I post is forever preserved on a server somewhere in the world, along with the other billions of Facebook statuses and Tweets that have come and are yet to be. If someone really cared, they could paint a picture of me using my entire Facebook history and come to a conclusion about who I am online. Would it be accurate to me, the person I see every day in the mirror? No. There are certain things I like to keep a mystery. At least the "About Me" section on my profile is completely and wholly reflective of who I am in person: "Come get to know me. I've got work to type."
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