Remember how I closed my BofA account? I wrote a semi-snarky letter and did my homework, copying the appropriate executives and feeling immensely satisfied about taking my drip in their wages out in one swipe. Well, apparently it got someone's attention.
A peon from the CEO's office called me back and left a message on my phone. I was curious now - someone had actually called me? Amazing. I wondered what they wanted. I called them back at 4:35 p.m. on a business day; already gone for the day. Left a message. Peon called again the following morning while I was running errands. I finally called him back again and got him in person, and here's what eventually transpired:
Peon: "Mrs. LaDow, we received your correspondence and I am in the process of closing your account."
Me: "Thanks."
Peon: "There's just a few details we need to take care of. When you closed your account, you did it five days into the new cycle. Therefore, you accrued some interest on that balance, and you'll need to pay that balance before we close the account."
Me: "... Oh-kaaaay."
Peon: "So if you just go ahead and do that, then we can take care of all this for you, all right?"
Me: "Yeah, GREAT. Thank youuuuuu."
Peon: "Goodbye." Click.
They think of all the details, don't they? Accruing interest on a daily basis instead of a monthly basis is super convenient. I bet he was sitting there in his satellite office somewhere in North Carolina, happy to get another several dozen dollars out of my pocket before bidding my business adieu.
At least they got the hint and spared me another sales pitch. I'm sure they'd be able to find the transcription of my phone calls with them a few months ago when their "customer service" branch refused to work with my astronomical APR and thought I needed credit counseling. Of course, once they transferred me to their choice of credit counseling services and the service found out about my spotless payment record and income, I wasn't approved for the service even if I had wanted it.
Yes, take a bite out of BofA if you can, but spit it back out. Quickly.
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